Dating in the Workplace

You can’t have a date without a date, so in order to make your own successful dates, you need to do your best to get yourself out of the door. Here are some tips for meeting interesting people. (Unless otherwise noted, all the below come directly from our self-help love coaching clients. If you’d like some of our dating advice for yourself, ask us for a consultation and we’ll find the right relationship coach for you!)

1. Be Prepared

The most important thing is to be ready to leave at the moment when the date is over. (Admittedly, “ready” comes with its own set of conditions. In short, have a plan and be prepared to follow it. If you can’t communicate with your date, be ready to end the date early. If you both can’t tell if you’re attracted to each other by yourself, then do some research and ask friends how the date was. The ultimate test is: Do you want to see this person again? If the answer is yes, you need to be prepared to go to the next step. If it’s no, then that’s okay too, but it may be better to call it a day. So be ready to end the date before it’s too late.) For example, if your friend takes you on a date and you have a great time, but there’s a part of you that just knows you don’t want to date the person your friend is suggesting, come home to yourself. If that’s the case, then say to your friend, “I want to hear more about you, but I want to spend time getting to know you before I’m ready to be with someone.” This lets your friend know that you’re good friends, but that you’re not ready for a relationship at this time.

You never know if someone is interested, so it’s best to be open and safe. Don’t ever attempt to be mean or stalk someone without their permission. Also, have an exit plan and if things don’t go the way you hope, you have a backup plan. (Yes, backup plans are good for relationships too.) No one wants to feel like they’ve been taken advantage of.

2. Be Willing to Put Yourself Out There

Don’t be afraid to call, initiate, and even talk about your personal life. If your friend is too private, maybe it’s time to let him/her know you’re interested. You may get an awkward, “I don’t
OkCupid is a free online dating service with lots of features designed to make it easy for people to search for new dates. In addition to selecting the right profile photo and coming up with an all-purpose signature, users can check if their matches have mutual friends or interests, suggest potential dates, or search via location, education, hobbies, religion, and age range. There’s even a special message board for users to share questions, ideas, and thoughts about relationships—and more importantly, this digital space is where OkCupid first started. The site’s original message board is called Ask a Guy, and it’s where users share all sorts of questions, and advice, in an easy-to-read, easy-to-respond format. If you’re a die-hard fan of Ask a Guy, there are tons of other message boards where you can keep tabs on where your favorite questions are being answered.

How and Why OkCupid Works

OkCupid works by allowing its users to communicate to others for free. You’ll need to create a free account (free to new users), fill out your information, upload a profile photo, and write up a short bio to describe yourself, among other small tasks. You’re immediately matched with others who either have similar interests, answered the question with an interesting answer, or met the other person’s search criteria. After that, you’re free to get to know a few more details about your match—from where they’re from to their favorite movies—and to eventually start the dating process.

There are no fees for using OkCupid, but you’re not going to get a lot of matches, so you’ll want to upgrade to the paid version (which costs $9.99/month or $39.99/year) if you’re hoping for a more extensive search. Either way, it’s free to search, but after using a few dates, you’ll want to upgrade to take advantage of the dating features in this online dating service.

How to Use OkCupid

You’ll need to create a free account on OkCupid to begin using the site. Once you’ve done that, start browsing the options in the main navigation area. If you decide to stick with the free version of the site, you’ll be presented with a variety of options in your sidebar, such as what type of date to go on (casual, dates, or hook-up) as well as the current season, and the location of